


Helping to Move On

by TreeOfTime



Category: Mass Effect, Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-29
Updated: 2017-11-29
Packaged: 2019-02-08 07:09:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12859413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TreeOfTime/pseuds/TreeOfTime
Summary: Garrus is by himself, surrounded by enemies on Omega and begins to have a delusion Shepard is with him, possibly to help him move on?





	Helping to Move On

When Garrus first saw Shepard sitting on the stool in the Omega hideout, he literally dropped the ammo he was clipping back into his rifle and stared like a total idiot. She was wearing her military fatigues and was wearing that little smirk she wore when she was internally laughing at her own bad joke. The fatigues told him immediately he was delusional, days without sleep was doing that to him. Stims were helping though, that was probably the problem on why he was seeing her. Even with knowing she wasn’t truly there? It felt good to see her, two years… two years she had been gone and it still killed him. She had been his best friend, his fellow soldier and sniper. He had been closer to her than other Turian soldiers. 

He felt a bullet clip his shields and he cursed, ducking more properly under the window, and finally managed to clip the ammo in. He tossed a grenade out the window and heard it explode, causing someone to scream before it was cut short by a bullet on the other side then went quiet as the gangs withdrew for a short time. With a quick glance of reassurance, he sat down on the floor and looked at her again, still smirking at him as she brushed her fringe behind her ear. Neither one spoke as they looked into each other’s eyes before he let out a trill of sadness. Even this delusion was comforting. Pathetic. 

“You are not real.” Garrus finally said, looking at her nervously as he began to wonder if her spirit was here to guide him home, to Palaven. 

“No, I am not.” She finally spoke, cracking her pointer finger knuckle out of habit. His delusion was terrifying real at this point. He quietly removed his helmet, grunting at the smell of rotting bodies, smoke, and spent casings.

“Are you here to guide me to an honorable death?” He asked hesitantly after he set down his helmet, wondering if he was truly ready to say goodbye to his life, to his father or sister. The Normandy family. Hope of Shepard being alive. Shepard chuckled, amused at his question.

“No, Garrus. I am here to comfort you and keep you company. I’ve been dead for two years, you’ve always known that.” Shepard said gently, smiling as she looked out at the bridge and sighed, almost with exhaustion. “I think you also need to resolve whatever is on your mind too, with me or I am here to help you figure out what’s been on your mind for the past two years.” She said this part thoughtfully, smirking again as she shifted her feet to hook on the foot bar of the stool and had her arm rest on her knees. 

“Shepard… are you truly dead?” Garrus asked after stabbing another stim into a artery in his hip, barely flinching now as there various punctures in the soft part of his hide on both sides. He lost count at twenty stims. 

“Yeah… probably.” Shepard said, rubbing her fingers through her hair before taking out the part that held it all together and let her hair fall naturally over her shoulders. He had seen her do it several times around the ship, it seemingly helping to collect her thoughts as she worked her hands. She did it now as she wove her hair back up and into a relaxed… ponytail? Yeah, that was it. Weird humans. 

“Probably?” Garrus echoed back, curious at her wording.

“Yeah, I mean, I’m your delusion. My wording is probably what you hope. It gives you a reason to keep going, doesn’t it?” Shepard said in her wise voice, smiling though it appeared tight on her face, it didn’t reach her eyes. 

“I suppose you are right.” Garrus said thoughtfully before Shepard perked up and looked out the window, looking excited.

“Another wave of mechs incoming!” Shepard said in delight, completely unlike her. Garrus grabbed his helmet and slid it back on, clicking it in place before he peeked over the edge and saw she was right. His delusion was acting as scout. Fantastic. Flicking the safety off his rifle, he perched it and began to make precise shots, taking out the five they sent out before ducking again. Shepard was standing at the window now, scanning. Completely unlike her, again. She’d be at the other window beside him, cursing foully and preparing her favorite firearm and rifle to help him out. He blinked and she was suddenly doing that, in her old N7 armor. “Yeah this feels better.” Shepard smirked at him, amused as she cradled her firearm in the crook of her elbow, sitting with her back to the bottom of the window. 

“I’m going nuts.” He muttered with a growl and Shepard grew more serious, commander mask in place. 

“Yeah, I think you are, at least a fraction.” She replied, slipping a bullet into the chamber of her rifle, and clicked it closed. “Garrus you have to focus, why am I here? I cannot help you in this fight for your life. What do you need to say?” Shepard glanced over the window sill before looking at him, expression serious. Garrus let out a soft trill of pain and his mandibles fluttered with his anxiety. Sighing he looked at her again and began to understand why she was there. 

“You… you just… died. The great Commander Shepard, hero and leader, died from lack of oxygen. You were immortal to me. You were my hero. I put you on a pedestal and you fucking fell off it while I wasn’t around.” He growled the last part, frustrated now. Shepard nodded, considering his words before she gestured for him to continue. “You died in the most horrible way, no blaze of glory in some great battle like a Krogan. You got sucked out into space and DIED.” He snarled the last word, growling more now. “Sure, you saved Joker but lost your life in the end, how is that fair?” He huffed, feeling foolish now.

“Garrus, Joker was my responsibility, he made a slight mistake, he wanted to save the ship and didn’t realize he was drowning in the process. I took his place, he was my crew and the captain, commander, is the last to leave the sinking ship. I didn’t make it in time.” Shepard said in a tone that reminded him of a mother comforting a child having a stupid temper tantrum. He deserved it, thinking on it now, at her funeral Garrus had snapped at Joker, blaming him for her death. Joker hadn’t taken it well by the way he got smashed and broke his hand from hitting the wall. “Joker already blames himself, constantly has these two years and you need to let my death go. It was my choice.” Shepard reminds him and Garrus looked down at that, saddened by the thought. Her choice to make a sacrifice for another, it was brave but shouldn’t have been the way she went out from this universe. 

“If you return from the dead, I’ll owe you a drink.” Garrus decided to joke, feeling a pressure in his chest release as she chuckled.

“I’ll keep you to that, Garrus Vakarian.” Her voice sounded distant and when he turned to look at her, he found her gone. Glancing around quickly, she was nowhere in sight or in presence. Releasing his breath harshly, he felt a sad realization while feeling a faint satisfaction that she gotten something off his shoulders. He really didn’t understand it completely, but he shifted his rifle, got into position, and waited for the bastards to come for him. He wouldn’t die quietly.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this on a random inspiration, doesn't entirely make sense I guess but enjoy!


End file.
